Breaching the Silence
by Your Kidney
Summary: Akito comes to Kaibara High and begins to whip Yuki in front of everyone. Kyo is the only person brave enough to stop him, saving the rat's life. A wall that's been standing between the cat and rat for centuries crumbles, leaving... friends? DISCONTINUED
1. Chapter 1

summary:yuki gets beaten up by akito at school, and kyo saves his life. this brings whole universes of walls crumbling down around them and leave…friends possibly? this also awakens powers of great weirdness. and…why the hell is akito acting so creepy? well…creepier than normal, that is.

pairings: yuki/kyo, kyo/haru and shigure/hatori

_smartass thoughts that are always truthful, and ever deadly annoying_

_normal thoughts_

•_second person not pov person thoughts•_

'normal talking'

phone conversations and lyrics 

akito's gonna be a guy in this fic.

ummm…for future reference, these are some japanese words I might use. urusai/shut up; neko/cat; nezumi/rat; inu/dog; tatsu/dragon/seahorse (i think); hebi/snake ; baka/idiot; kuso/can be used as damn but literal translation is shit or bullshit; oushi/cow; shishou/martial arts teacher. who doesn't know that one!; nani/what?; daijabou ka/are you alright?; oi/hey!; gomen (nasai) /im sorry; arigato/thank you; aishiteru/i love you; kami-sama/ god. i cant remember anymore now. ill add more at the top of a chapter if i use any new ones. not positive of all the animals, so kill me if im wrong.

summary: Akito comes to Kaibara High for unknown reasons and starts to whip Yuki. Kyo saves him, but what does that awaken? Will old walls held up around the cat and rat crumble, leaving friends? And…Kyo gets the power of the elements? Kyo/Yuki, Shigure/Hatori

discalimer. i dont own furuba. tho i wish i did. :scowls angrilly: oh well. if i owned it, i would have made it a very, very, very slashy stori. no het pairings at _all! _:cackles evilly in the famous manner of evil people with evil plans and taps fingers together while looking through the steeple made by them.:

I searched far and wide for a poem that fit Kyo, so…after about half an hour of looking through poetry books at my home, I came upon _Alone_ by Edgar Allan Poe.

Hopefully I'll be able to find enough poems to put in the beginning of each chapter that sort of matches the mood…okay? So…here goes nothing.

_ALONE_

_From childhood's hours I have not been_

_As others were—I have not seen_

_As others saw—I could not bring_

_My passions from a common spring—_

_From the same source I have not taken_

_My sorrow—I could not awaken_

_My heart to joy at the same tone—_

_And all I loved—_I_ loved alone._

Then_—in my childhood—in the dawn_

_Of a most stormy life—was drawn_

_From ev'ry depth of good and ill_

_The mystery which binds me still—_

_From the torrent, or the fountain—_

_From the red cliff of the mountain—_

_From the sun that round me rolled_

_In its autumn tint of gold—_

_From the lightning in the sky_

_As it passed me flying by—_

_From the thunder, and the storm—_

_And the cloud that took the form_

_(When the rest of heaven was blue)_

_Of a demon in my view._

_Edgar Allen Poe_

CHAPTER ONE OF BREACHING THE SILENCE

KYO-KUN'S POV

THE MIND'S CONFESSIONS

_I don't know if I ever hated him. Yuki, I mean. He can be really annoying sometimes, but I'm not sure if it was ever hate. I think the only reason I ever fought him was to get his attention. I felt that if I didn't, then he wouldn't even know that I was alive. And I wanted him to know. If there wasn't the expectancy to fight, because we were cat and rat, we could probably be good friends. The thing that I hate the most is that he doesn't try to see _me_. I don't think he cares at all. He's part of the juunishi_, _and cares about the religion and follows it. Akito made sure of that, I bet, seeing how _close _they were when they were younger._

'Breakfast!' Tohru's kind voice shattered through my thoughts. I climbed out of bed and threw on the first pair of clothes that my hands reached.

Yuki's door slammed as he walked out of his room. I cracked mine open just a little to watch him walk away.

_Why can't we be friends? What did I do wrong?_

I buried my face in my hands and sighed.

_Gods, this world is so screwed up._

I finished buttoning up my shirt and walked downstairs.

Breakfast passed by in silence. I didn't talk to anyone, and Yuki and Tohru spoke lightly of boring things. School, most likely. Blah. _They're so suited for each other. Both calm and serious. I don't think I've ever seen either of them joking around. Well, I hardly do, either. I just wish they would show more emotion than near nothingness. They can laugh and have a good time, but only when I'm not there. I'm the _cat_. I don't belong any_where_ or with any_one

Once breakfast was done, I grabbed my bag and Tohru's hand, Yuki taking the other. A slight foreboding hung over the air as if something very bad was going to happen today.

A small cloud of dust followed the three of us as we walked down the dirt road that lead to the school. It was uneventful until we reached the yard. There was shouting coming from the center and there was a huge crowd grouped around someone.

'Yuki! Where is he! I know he's here! Bring him to me!' Yuki froze. Fear filled his eyes and tears threatened to fall.

'No. Please, no! No!' He let go of Tohru's hand and used his own to wipe his eyes. 'Akito. Don't do this. Don't come here. You'll only hurt someone.'

I saw Yuki summon a lot of courage, and he walked forward into the circle.

'Akito. I'm right here.'

'No! Yuki! No! You know what he'll do to you!' I half lurched forward and grabbed his arm to stop him, but let go and stepped back, hanging my head in defeat and in fear of what would happen to me if Akito found out I had tried to keep his _precious rat_ from him.

Yuki turned back to me, his eyes full of hatred. 'Kyo, I have to do this. Please, don't stop me.' He set his face and turned to his enemy once more.

'Ah. My sweet, little nezumi. Where've you been all this time?' Akito said in his sickly sweet voice. 'I haven't seen you in ages! You really have to come and see me sometime. I would greatly like that.' He took hold of the back of the mouse's neck and brought his mouth to Yuki's ear. 'Would you like me to lock you away again? In that dark room? I could, you know. It could be…_fun_. And…well, you know what I could do to you. You need more…_training._ I think you've forgotten who you truly are.'

The crowd started whispering to one another. 'Who is this?' 'How does he know The Prince?' 'What's he doing to him?' 'Why is Sohma-kun so scared?' 'Is there anything we can do to stop him?' 'They look almost exactly alike!' 'What's he saying to him?'

My features contorted to match Yuki's of pain. _What's Akito _doing_ to him?_

'Akito…stop it. Stop right now.'

'And what can you do to make me? I can cause you just as much pain as the nezumi. And Hatori won't dare to stop me. No one will. Or can.'

I stepped back into the crowd, angrier at Akito that I had ever been in my whole life. He had kept me from saving someone I felt needed to be saved, even though the person in question would hate me forever if I interfered.

'Now. What was I thinking of doing to you?' Our leader looked up in mock forgetfulness. 'Oh yes.' Akito pulled out from the deep pockets of the robe that was hanging lightly off one shoulder a whip as black as night. He unwrapped it from around the handle and let it fall, leaving it to drag on the ground.

Yuki's eyes lost every ounce of courage in them, and they became fearful as a rat in front of a god. Which, to an extent, was what it was. The crowd had still been muttering, but became louder at the sight of the whip.

Akito gave a shrill screech and lept at Yuki. The whip flashed out, landing squarely across the rat's cheek. A big welt spread across his face and blood dripped, giving the appearance of red tears mingling with the real ones.

The gray haired nezumi staggered back, holding his fingers to the wound, which were coated in red when he took them away to examine them.

Akito struck again with the whip, this time it grazed Yuki's shoulder and wrapped around to hit Yuki's back. His uniform started to tear open where he was hit. His face was pouring tears, but he didn't dare to run away, in fear Akito would just go after someone else. The blood fell dully to the ground, splattering everywhere.

'Someone! Go for help!' I dimly remembered shouting, trying to wave someone away to get the principal. No one went. They were all frozen, looking towards Yuki, even Tohru.

I couldn't stand to look anymore. I didn't care what Akito would do to me. Yuki was being hurt, and in my mind, I was the only one who was allowed to even try to inflict pain upon him.

I sneaked around the crowd until I was facing Akito's back. Taking a deep breath, I broke through the ring of people, and threw myself onto his back. He came crashing to the ground, and lay, struggling; trying to get free from my grip.

Yuki ran over into a corner, and huddled into a small ball, wincing when he bumped the newfound cuts. Everyone went and crowded around him, pressing, inquiring to see if he was alright.

'Akito!' I shouted back at him. 'Don't move anywhere, or I'll lock you in that room that you want to put me in!'

'You wouldn't dare. Hatori would stop you.'

'I would dare. And I'd kill anyone who gets in my way. Just like you would.' I said the last sentence under my breath as I looked forward again.

I pushed everyone to the side to get to Yuki. 'Come on. We need to call Hatori.'

_Why have I suddenly become so over-protective of him? Have I gone mental!_

Yuki nodded and gingerly stood up, following me.

'Who's Hatori?' asked Uo, appearing at my side, the picture of curiousity.

'Ah…family doctor. The only one the Sohma's trust to take care of us. And…we have other reasons for a family one.'

'Do you think you're too good for other doctors?' she said cheekily.

I growled. _I really don't need this right now._ 'No. Inner Sohmas like Hatori are the only one who can even partially understand the hardship of me and thirteen others. Including himself. Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to talk to him.'

'What makes you think no one else will understand you?'

'Because we know from experience. No one understand us. We freak them out. Now just shut up. I'm already going to be killed by Hatori and Akito, so I don't need to be pestered by you.' I walked away from a very confused Uo, dragging a very hurt Yuki.

'You'll be alright. No one's going to hurt you now.'

'I thought I told you to stay out of this. I don't need your help now.'

'Oh really?' I let Yuki drop to the ground. 'Get up. It'll show you just how much you need me now.' Yuki slowly tried to rise to his feet, but he slumped down, exhausted with loss of blood.

'Fine, help me. _If you must_,' he said, his voice dripping venom.

I winced. _Ouch. Yuki, please don't hate me so much. Can't you tell how much it's hurting me? Gods, you're thick_. I pulled the nezumi up from the ground, and pulled him over to where Akito was standing.

'Sit,' I ordered both of them. Yuki collapsed, but Akito didn't. 'Do you wan't me to drag you down again?'

'Try.' Akito cocked his head and a sneer crossed his face.

'Fine. Thank you for letting me do what I've wanted to do to you _since I first met you!_' I slammed my hands down on his shoulders and kicked violently at the backs of his knees, then I pushed down. He crumpled with a scream. '_How dare you!_' I sat myself on his back and just relaxed with a "sadistic bastard smirk" crossing my face, glorifying (is that even a word? ive been around one of my friends too much who makes up new words like that all the time, that it eventually becomes part of my vocab. dont ask, for I shall not give you a good answer as i have no idea where the hell it came from.) in the satisfaction I got in hurting Akito. _Serves you right, for all the shit you've put me through._

_I wonder if Hatori will know where his patient is. Hopefully, because I don't want to borrow a cell phone._

Everyone lounged about, not bothering to go to classes. Questions were asked, but I didn't bother to answer and I don't think Akito dared to, or Yuki the ability to. He was apparently asleep.

I looked over to his face. His gray hair framed the features that were marred by a welt crossing his cheek. His face was screaming, but he remained silent. He showed the pain that he refused to let others see when he was awake. The pain hidden behind his purple eyes. The pain he smoothed over, not letting others see.

_He's amazing. I wish I could do that. All I can do is direct my fear and sadness and pain towards something, and it'll come out as anger. _I laughed humorlessly._ All I could do was need anger management._

'Kyo, get off Akito's back. You'll put him in worse condition than he was before.' My head shot up, and I stared into the eyes of the family doctor.

'Thank Gods you're here. Akito came here, as you know, and started to whip Yuki. I stopped him, and…hurt him a little.'

Hatori looked over to Yuki and stopped dead in his tracks. 'Oh…my…God…! What happened to him?'

'Akito.' But Hatori ignored me and walked over to the gray haired nezumi. He pulled away the hair that was sticking to the dried blood, and examined his face. Turning towards me, he spoke. 'Take him home. I'll be there soon. There's a few memories I have to erase, and I don't want him to stay here. He might…you know.'

I heard a gasp from behind me. I spun around. 'No! Why did you bring him?' I pointed towards a silver haired man standing there. Yuki's fan girls were staring at him and muttering something about their Prince.

'I came because I heard Akito was at your school, and that he might have hurt Yuki! I want to make that pain go away!'

'You knew he would be coming here and hurting him?'

'Yes. Akito told us. But we didn't dare stop him.'

'How can you say you love your brother if you let Akito half kill him!'

'But…there was nothing I could do.'

'If you truly cared for him, you wouldn't have cared what happened to yourself if only he was safe.'

Hatori stepped up. 'And…you're saying you know someone who would do that?'

'Yes.'

'Who?'

'Me. How else do you think Yuki was still alive when you came, and I was sitting on Akito's back?'

'You don't hate him?'

'I never said I didn't hate him. I only hate Akito more than him, and I don't hate Yuki enough that I'll see his enemy torture him. I know what that whip feels like, you know. And why didn't you come earlier if you knew he was here?'

'Because…I don't know. Fear, I guess.'

'Baka tatsu. You're supposed to be the stronger one, and here I am, bringing down Akito.'

'I'm in no mood to fight. Just take Yuki home.'

'Why should I?'

'Because you showed him kindness once, it stands to reason that you should again. Do it…for him. For me. For yourself.'

'No.'

'Kyo, just take him home.'

'NO!'

'For Kazuma.'

'What does Shishou have to do with this!'

'I will if I have to. Just do this. Or I'll…persuade Akito to let you live in the same house as him. Just a room away, in Yuki's old torture room.'

My eyes widened considerably. 'You wouldn't!'

'Just do it,' he pleaded.

'FINE!' I pulled Yuki up and he blinked wearily. 'You have to walk part of the way home. I'm not taking you all the way.'

'Whatever.'

I kept a tight grip on his upper arm, and caught him if he started to slip.

_Why did I say I didn't want to take Yuki home in the first place? Did I not want to show too much kindness towards him? Did I think that helping him once was enough? That I didn't want to help him any more?_

_How can I say I want to be his friend if I don't even want to help him once more than usual. Than I had before._

_Because he's never shown you kindness once in your life._

_Maybe he will once he realizes I've been nice to him._

_Hah! I seriously doubt that._

_Yeah. You're right. But…you can always hope._

'Oh! Wait a second!' I turned around to see Hatori looking at me. I raised my eyebrows. 'Don't let Yuki run away. I'm going to look at him in a couple hours. But first I have to erase these people's memories. We don't want our family considered criminal just because of Akito. And…try your hardest to be kind to Yuki. I don't think he hates you. It really hurts him when you fight.'

I snarled, because I didn't know what else to do, and turned back around.

'Come on, Yuki. We have to leave before I change my mind about taking you home.'

Once the school was safely out of sight, I let go of the rat.

'Just walk home on your own. I'm not helping you any further.'

He tried to stand up, but once he was fully on his feet, he fell forward onto me. At first, I was tense, and then my muscles loosened. He was so frail, and I wanted to help him no matter what. But I had to help him slightly. I didn't want him to know I cared.

I shoved Yuki off of me, and he landed hard on the ground.

_His body pressed against mine for that short moment…it almost…felt…_good

_WAIT! What the hell am I THINKING! I've spent WAY too much time around Shigure. Kami-sama._

_You know you like him._

_Shut up! I'm straight! So…then…how would I be able to like Yuki? Hm?_

_Hmmm…let's see…how about…maybe you're a gay in denial!_

_Hell no. I'm definitely _not!_ I'm honest with myself._

_You are?_

_Grrrrr!_

I stormed ahead, but on impulse I looked back. He was shivering on the ground, looking helpless. My heart softened, then hardened. I wanted to get his attention, and I'd do anything for that right now.

'Hey! Kuso nezumi! Show you've got more sense in that pea-sized brain of yours and walk! I hope you know I'm not going to carry you any more.'

Yuki faced away from me, and started shaking hard. At first I thought he was laughing, and then I thought it was in anger. But when he slowly stood up and looked at me, I realized he was crying.

'Why. Why? WHY? What is with you! Why are you always so mean to me! Haven't you heard of something called kindness! It would be nice if you used it more often. And why the hell did you help me today? Isn't that a bit against what you're supposed to do? Help the rat? Why did you decide to suddenly be nice once, and then go back to the horrible you?' Yuki flung himself at me, punching as hard as he could. He was worked up, and so mad, that he couldn't see straight. He missed me many times, but once, he hit me in the stomach as hard as he could. I doubled over in pain, tears starting to well in my eyes.

'Oof!' I looked up to Yuki. 'So its a fight you want?'

'Either a good fight, or peace.'

'I'll take the fight.'

_And why am I taking the fight?_

_Because you don't want him to know you don't hate him._

_Shut up._

_Why?_

_Arrrggghhh! I hate you._

_Thanks._

'Bring it on, rat-boy! Or are you too scared now!'

Yuki came flying at me, still too angry to see right.

That's when I realized something.

_Yuki's like me now. He's so mad at me, that he has no clue what the hell is going on. He sees red._

_Does that mean maybe I could beat him if I'm calm sometimes? That would be…wow. I might be able to…he might lose against me. Or I could get him so worked up that he was like me, and I'd be able to fight him like that, too! Then…then maybe Akito wouldn't be able to kidnap me. I'll challenge him sometime. But this isn't the best time to be doing that. I just want to stop him now._

The next time Yuki threw a punch at me, I stepped up close, and pinned his arms to his sides. He struggled, but within a few more seconds, he relaxed and then spoke.

'I suppose it was helpless to think that you might understand what it meant to be left out and thrown to the side by Akito. I suppose it was helpless to think that we might have been friends. But thank you for at least listening, even if it was forced. And thanks for attempting to calm me down. I'm…I'm…I'm sorry to hurt you.' I looked down into Yuki's eyes. He seemed sincere. It was the very first time I had heard him apologize to me.

The rat suddenly slumped down, his hands grasping at my back for support. My arms around him tightened, and Yuki gave out a gasp of pain.

'The…the cuts! Ow!'

'Oh. Uh…sorry.'

'Aaahhh…' It was a exhale of pure pain.

_Huh?_

It seemed that Yuki had fainted.

'Ah well. Guess I have to carry him home. Whatever.' _Anything to be closer to him._

_Wait! What did I just think!_

_What you think it did._

_And what did it say?_

_That you…wanted to be closer to him._

_Hold it!_

_Hey. I'm just repeating what you thought._

_Well, shut up._

_Hate you._

_Thanks._

_Okay, this is weird. Having an argument with myself. A self that seems to know every little thing that goes on in my brain._

_Thanks for giving me so much credit._

_I DIDN'T ASK YOU!_

_But I still answered._

_Okay. This is getting us nowhere. What did I mean when I thought that? It was just…random. I don't know what I was doing._

_Just say it. You…I think you like him._

_DO NOT!_

_And what if you did?_

_Well…he likes Tohru. I think. At the most, he doesn't at least hate my guts as much as I thought he did. Maybe._

_I think its more than that. I think he loves Tohru as much as you do, but both of you love her like a sister. That's my hypothesis._

_Don't confuse me._

_Baka. Anyhow, I know he doesn't hate you. I'm sure of it._

_Well, I'm not._

_Then…ask him._

_I will, when he wakes up. Maybe._

_What was that! Of course you'll ask him! Or I will for you! I can probably make you do something, if I try hard enough._

_You'll have try for the rest of my life, but it'll never be enough. Now, shut up._

_Whatever._

I realized then, that I hated the stupid guy that lived inside my head and pointed out the painfully obvious. Well…obvious to him, but not to me.

I also realized then that the hand that wasn't helping to hold up Yuki had come up to bury itself in his hair. I pulled it away quickly, hoping he wouldn't remember.

_Baka. Of course he won't. He's asleep._

I pulled his arm around my neck, grabbed his hand, and I put my other arm around his waist to keep him steady. I tried to keep my hands away from the cuts, so I wouldn't hurt him, and so I wouldn't get more blood on me, but it was kind of hard, as they were all over his back, front and arms.

I walked to the house this way, half dragging him, trying not to be too rough.

Shigure was standing inside, with his hand coming out of the neck of his kimono, and he was scratching his chin.

'Well, well, well. Look at that two love birds coming home! I don't think you'd have ever expected it from the two worst enemies such as yourselves. Oh! Ha'ri and Aaya are coming over today!'

'Shut your big fat mouth!'

'Such foul language! Now, why don't you whisk Yuki off to some secret place and…well…'

'YOU _PERVERT!_'

I kicked Shigure through the wall, leaving a gaping hole in the paper.

'My pooooor house!' he wailed.

'Baka.' I dropped Yuki to the ground and stormed upstairs and out the window onto the roof. For now, it was the only place besides my bed that wasn't crawling with other people. And now, my room was way, way too stuffy. I needed to breathe without everyone crowding me.

I watched the clouds roll by until I drifted off into an uneasy sleep.


	2. Untitled

pairings. yuki/kyo and shigure/hatori

_smartass thoughts that are always truthful, and ever deadly annoying_

_normal thoughts_

•_second person not pov person thoughts•_

'normal talking'

phone conversations and lyrics 

akito's gonna be a guy in this fic.

i dont own furuba, and if i did, then…i wouldn't have a life's savings of about $400 which im using to save up for for a violin. i would be a very rich person who…if i felt like it…would read and rite fanfics for the heck of it anyways!

This ones also by Edgar Allen Poe. He's awesome!

_THE LAKE TO-_

_In spring of youth it was my lot_

_To haunt of the wide world a spot_

_To which I could not love the less—_

_So lovely was the lonliness_

_Of a wild lake, with black rock bound,_

_And the tall pines that towered around._

_But when the night had thrown her pall_

_Upon the spot, as upon all,_

_And the mystic wind went by_

_Murmuring in melody,_

_Then—ah, then—I would awake_

_To the terror of the lonely lake._

_Yet that terror was not fright,_

_But a tremulous delight—_

_A feeling not the jeweled mine_

_Could teach or bribe me to define—_

_Not love—although the love was thine._

_Death was in that poisonous wave,_

_And in its gult a fitting grace_

_For him who thence could solace bring_

_To his lone imagining,_

_Whose solitary sould could make_

_And Eden of that dim lake._

_Edgar Allen Poe_

Chapter Two•Yuki-kun's POV

_Why is Kyo being so nice? Does even he know that he is? I like it when he's nice, though. I get his attention without being insulting. Before, I'd have to fight him to get it. The only reason I'd fight him back when he fought me was to be noticed by him just that little bit more._

_When I fell onto him, he didn't tense up like I thought he would. He almost welcomed me, and then he threw me to the ground and walked away. When he looked back, I didn't see the normal Kyo. I'm sure I saw the true him. And a sad him. Not one consumed by the want to fight and be fought back. I wish he was like that more. I wish he stays like this. Not angry towards me all the time, or quite as much. And I hope it isn't just for today, and because of Akito. Even if it is, I have enough kindness to last a while. Long enough, that is, that I won't have to fight him for half a year._

My thoughts were shattered as the door opened, and Hatori entered.

'Take off you shirt,' he ordered. I peeled the ripped uniform gently from my cuts. I gasped in pain when one of them opened and started to drip blood. The tatsu doctor bent over the wounds, and carefully examined them. 'Any idea why Akito did this to you?'

I shook my head. 'He said something about how I never visit him, but I don't think he'd half kill me over such a small thing.' Hatori sighed.

I groaned as I heard a loud "ALL RIGHT!" coming from the kitchen.

_Ayame was here. Shit._ 'Why'd you have to bring the idiot?'

'Aaya?' I nodded. 'He said he hadn't seen Shigure in a while, and…' Hatori grinned, 'he wanted to see you.'

I lifted myself high enough so I could flop down onto my stomach, my purpleish gray hair spreading over my pillow like a dry waterfall. _Why did my brother always have to come whenever I was suffering? He only made things worse._

Hatori bandaged up my upper back. 'Take care, Yuki. And please, be nice to Kyo, for once. I think it really hurts him when you fight.'

I just stared bankly at the wall for a moment, before looking back to Hatori. 'How do you know? You can't tell anything about Kyo unless he tells you.'

'Kyo really isn't quite as mad when he's near you. He's actually happy, and he smiles more. You can definitly tell that there's an annoyance and deep sadness from fighting you all the time.'

My heart wrenched at what Hatori had said. My selfishness had caused someone I liked pain. Apparently, Hatori noticed, because he asked, 'What's wrong?'

'It's all…my fault. That Kyo's so moody around me. Trying to hide… sadness? It's my…selfishness. I wanted to get his attention, and the only way I could do that…was to fight him.' Tears welled up in my eyes and I fought the urge to break down crying completely. I noticed that when Hatori walked out of the room, he had a small smile on his face. _What was on his mind?_ The thought didn't bother me much longer. I watched out of my window the coloring trees swaying in the slight breeze. A little of it wafted in through my open window. I breathed in deeply the sweet scent of fall, and fell into a light, dreamless sleep.


	3. The Mabudachi Trio Strikes Again!

pairings. yuki/kyo and shigure/hatori

_smartass thoughts that are always truthful, and ever deadly annoying_

_normal thoughts_

•_second person not pov person thoughts•_

'normal talking'

phone conversations and lyrics 

akito's gonna be a guy in this fic.

look at all the pretty boys that i dont own!

Another Poe. Sorry, but I love him:::::huggs self:

_DREAM WITHIN A DREAM_

_Take this kiss upon the brow!_

_And, in parting from you now, _

_Thus much let me avow- _

_You are not wrong, who deem _

_That my days have been a dream; _

_Yet if hope has flown away _

_In a night, or in a day, _

_In a vision, or in none, _

_Is it therefore the less gone? _

_All that we see or seem _

_Is but a dream within a dream. _

_I stand amid the roar_

_Of a surf-tormented shore, _

_And I hold within my hand_

_Grains of the golden sand—_

_How few! yet how they creep_

_Through my fingers to the deep,_

_While I weep- while I weep!_

_O God! can I not grasp_

_Them with a tighter clasp?_

_O God! can I not save_

_One from the pitiless wave?_

_Is all that we see or seem_

_But a dream within a dream?_

_Edgar Allen Poe_

CHAPTER 3•THE MABUDACHI TRIO STRIKES AGAIN!•HATORI-KUN'S POV

I walked downstairs grinning. Kyo wanted to be friends with Yuki, and Yuki wanted to be friends with Kyo, and both of them only fought each other so that they would be noticed by the other.

I had an idea.

I sat down at the table with Shigure and Aaya. They had a photo album of us in high school in front of them, telling stories about the "good old days."

'You guys, I have something to tell you,' I said, and both of them looked up as one.

'What?' they asked together.

'I was talking to Yuki and the issue of Kyo came up…' I told them the whole conversation between us. 'And…!and…!I have a feeling that Kyo doesn't hate Yuki like everyone thought he does. So…any ideas popping up?'

Aaya leaned forward. 'It could be that my little brother's starting to fall in love with someone! And I'll be there to help him every step of the way.' Ayame smiled proudly.

'Even if it's only a friendship Yuki wants, we should give it to him.'

'This is where I can truly help my brother! I'm so happy!'

'Oh, Ha'ri, do you…remember…' Shigure looked expectingly at me.

Then I remembered.

Our secret weapon.

'Sake,' all three of us said at once, with huge grins plastered on our faces.

'So…how'll we do it this time?' Shigure asked us.

'Let's just say we're having a party and then force it on them. Then give them more and more until they don't realize what they're drinking! Then…we'll go outside and watch the results.

'I think we should try and let them work it out on their own. I did tell both of them that neither of them wanted to fight the other.'

'Aww, Ha'ri! You're boring!'

'We'll give them a week, then we try our plan. Hopefully, we'll get to use it. And if they overcome their differences, then we'll still use the plan, except to take it one step further. More than friends.' I grinned at Shigure and Aaya's faces when they heard what I said. It was worth it to act out of character sometimes, if only to see their reactions, but sometimes I came up with good ideas, and not all of them were Hatori-like.

Ahigure and Aaya both got over their shock and grinned.

'Then, let's hope for our amusement, they do become friends.'

'Now, we just need a plan to get Tohru out of the house. She'll freak if they get drunk. Probably call the police after she realizes she can't reach any of us, because we'll be outside without telling her where we are and without a cell phone.'

'Oh no! That would be horrible! Just the thought of my poor, precious flower getting worried over those two is just too much for my mind to bear!' Aaya reeled around the kitchen with his head in his hands, until Shigure calmed him down.

A sense of calm settled over me.

The Mabudachi Trio strikes again!


	4. Musings of All

pairings. yuki/kyo and shigure/hatori

_smartass thoughts that are always truthful, and ever deadly annoying_

_normal thoughts_

•_second person not pov person thoughts•_

'normal talking'

phone conversations and lyrics 

akito's gonna be a guy in this fic.

hell, if i owned this, then…:scratches head…: i might have something better to do with my time than spend the whole day looking at the comp like the loser i am!

oh. i also dont own foo fighters. i use time and time again. i love that song…

_REVENGEFUL MISERY_

_Thy misery grows deep_

_How can this be and nothing great_

_The hatred of thy soul is wider than believed_

_No coming out nor coming close_

_Hurt thy and thou shalt die._

_Die within thy heart and mind._

_Hate thy and thou shalt be hated._

_Kill thy confidence and thy shalt kill thou heart._

_Destruction is bliss._

_Thy destruction is greater than thou hate,_

_Spite thy and thou shalt depart from life._

_Who Knows?_

CHAPTER 4•Musings of All•YUKI-KUN'S POV

I woke up to the door opening. I looked up and saw Shigure come in.

'Hatori and Aaya are staying for about a week. I just want to tell you so that you aren't too suprised!' Shigure stepped out of my room, humming a strange tune.

_Damn! Why does my brother have to stay!_

With a groan, I stepped out of bed and down the steps. As I passed the dining room, Ayame called out, 'Come in and spend a few brotherly moments with me!'

'Idiot,' I growled, and kept on walking until I got to my garden. I sat down on a patch of grass with my back to a rock. My gaze wandered over to the house, and settled on the roof, where Kyo was sitting.

_I never knew you could see the house from here._

I watched Kyo for a while, his golden red hair fluttering across his face and brushing against bloodred eyes. Beautiful eyes.

He was looking straight at me, and I wonderd briefly if he saw me.

Tears filled my eyes as I watched him, and remembered all the times I'd fought him, just so he would know I existed. Did he fight back for the same reason?

_I'm a total jerk. I don't know why he even likes me, if I practically kill him every time I see him._

I hate myself.

KYO'S POV

I had been sitting on the roof for a while, when I felt eyes on me. I looked through the trees, and saw that I could see the edge of Yuki's garden. My eyes ran along the edge of it, and I realized I could see most of it. I stopped at the rock. I saw sitting with his back to it the nezumi. He was looking towards me, and I wonder if he saw me. His violet eyes crashed with mine. They widened, and Yuki looked away. I made a promise to myself that I would never come onto the roof until I was sure Yuki wasn't watching.

_I like him, but he's creepy sometimes, and he's confusing. Always happy if I'm hiding and looking in on him with Tohru, sad when I'm around. Could what Hatori said be true? Does Yuki really not hate me like he acts? Why? Gr._

I sat up and got off the roof. Once I was safely in my room, I closed the window and door and examined my face.

_Why does everyone stare at me all the time? The only thing strange about me was my hair and my eyes. But when people stare, it isn't in fear, or anything of that sort._

_People only stare becasue I'm a freak. Not like Yuki. He's not an outcast. He's welcome in the family. Tohru was the only one who's stood up for me that wasn't in the immediate family, and accepted me for who I really was. Even after she saw…_

My fingers automatically went to the beads around my wrist.

_But Tohru would do that for anyone. That's just how she is. Kind and loving to everyone. She's like an over-nice sister, someone who you love to take care of and protect from anything. But I think Yuki's her favorite. So much like herself. Always calm and polite. Not like me. I yell too much and I have too much of a temper. But not like I want to be like her and that damn rat!_

_Yuki._

_Why do I feel so drawn to him?_

HATORI-KUN'S POV

(remember… _•second person thoughts go here. i use this later on in this chapter•)_

_This is going to be so much fun! Me and the two others haven't done anything like this since…Kana left._

I immediately lost my unusually cheerful mood.

_Kana…_

_Kana…_

_Kana._

I crept into Shigure's office, my temporarty bedrom, and turned on the radio, seeing if there was anything on it that could cheer me up.

I am a one way motorway

I'm the one that drives away

Then follows you back home

I am a street light shining

I'm a wild light blinding bright

Burning off alone

It's times like these you learn to live again

It's times like these you give and give again

It's times like these you learn to love again

It's times like these time and time again

I am a new day rising

I'm a brand new sky

To hang the stars upon tonight

I am a little divided

Do I stay or run away

And leave it all behind?

It's times like these you learn to live again

It's times like these you give and give again

It's times like these you learn to love again

It's times like these time and time again.

It's times like these you learn to live again

It's times like these you give and give again

It's times like these you learn to love again

It's times like these time and time again.

It's times like these you learn to live again

It's times like these you give and give again

It's times like these you learn to love again

It's times like these time and time again.

It's times like these you learn to live again

It's times like these you give and give again

It's times like these you learn to love again

It's times like these time and time again. 

_This song…well it definitly didn't cheer me up like I hoped something could._ My finger slammed down on the power button. _I hate it! It just reminds me of my own pain. And my lonliness._

I dropped to my knees, and my head fell down to land in my arms. And sobbed.

_Kana. Why did you leave me. Don't you realize how much I miss you? Why did you leave me all by myself? All alone to carry the weight of my sadness. _

_Don't ever think that I've forgotten about what I was forced to do to you._

_Because I haven't. And I never will._

'Kana, you will always remain in my memories,' I whispered, loud enough to be heard.

'Thinking about Kana again?'

I whirled around to see Shigure standing by the doorway, looking strangely subdued.

'What're you doing here?'

'I was going to write, but then I realized you were in here. I don't have to.'

'No…it's fine. I can leave, or I could stay in here. I don't mind it.'

'I'll stay in here, but not to type. I just want to talk. With someone who isn't as loud as Aaya. He's my best friend, and all, but sometimes I need someone calm.'

I smiled. 'So…what do you want to talk about?'

'Oh, I don't know.'

Shigure came and linked his arms around my neck from behind. I leaned my head on his arm in exhaustion.

'I miss Kana. She was just so…I needed her. And now that she's gone… well, it was a huge blow to me. I just feel so…alone now. I don't like it.'

'We all miss her. And me and Aaya are always here for you when you need a friend. We aren't going to abandon you, I hope you know.'

I smiled again. 'Thanks. That means a lot to me.'

Shigure released me, and slid down to the floor next to me. 'Heh. Just as long as you don't abandon us.'

My eyebrows rose.

'_Just_ kidding! Me and Aaya'll stay with you no matter what.'

I chuckled. 'Thank you. You two are always here to make me laugh when I get too serious. Next time, slap me when I get boring.'

'You're not boring. You're a lot better than you've been in a long time. Before you even met Kana…now that was when I felt like slapping you. But you were the one that found out about Yuki and Kyo wanting peace between them. And you gave us the idea to use Sake. I don't think you're necessarily _boring_.'

'You're the one being a little more serious that usual. Should I slap you?'

'No. I'm a person that can never be slapped. I'm just too loved by everyone, and no one would dare to hurt me.'

'That's the Shigure that I like to see.'

'Really, Ha-san. You _are_ boring now that I think about it.'

'So…are we going to spend the whole night chatting about when we're boring and when we aren't?'

'No.'

I shivered. _It's cold. And I feel so lonely._

Tears started to trickle slowly down my face again. 'Have you ever felt that you're just so empty, like something's missing, but you don't know what it is?'

'Yeah. I do. When I was little, my best friend was Aaya. He was my _only_ friend. The only person my age I even remotely knew. We were practically brothers, but he could never listen to your problems with a straight face. Ever. He would find some way to make a joke of it and shrug it off. He _didn't care_. I didn't know what I was missing for quite a while. That's because I never had it in the first place to miss. I didn't realize it until the day I first talked with you. I needed someone serious. When we became friends, the empty space went away. I knew I was destined to always stick by your side _no matter what_ the first time I remember seeing you.'

•_And I knew that day I was destined to fall in love with you, and never fall out. I also knew that there would be a one in a thousand chance that you would return my feelings.•_

I just basked in the warm feeling of being with Shigure. Every bit of lonliness was sucked out of me as glanced into the warm, brown eyes of my best friend.

My mouth twisted up into a small smile, and I pulled Shigure into a tight hug.

We just sat with our backs to the wall, drinking in the rare feeling of being held by another.

'I love you…Hatori.'

I started. 'W-what?' I looked down at Shigure, and saw that he had fallen asleep. He was so calm and relaxed, that I didn't have the heart to move him to his own room.

My arms tightened around my best friend protectively. Though, what I was protecting him from, I didn't know.

I rested my cheek against his silky hair and sighed. _What did Shigure mean by 'I love you'? As a friend? Or…more?_

_He's too confusing._

_But…what if he didn't mean as only a friend?_

_Because…I don't know if I could love him back._

_Or could I?_

_No. I doubt it. I love Kana._

_Loved._

_Loved? Maybe so. Maybe she left…so I could fall in love with Shigure._

_But…I don't know if I love him._

_You people these days. Always in denial for their true feelings. Face it. You're in love._

_No. Don't you think I would have noticed?_

_All you could tell was that you were never lonely around him the way you were with other people._

_That's not love._

_Do I have to argure with you all night? Just kiss him. That'll tell you you love him._

_But…I-I couldn't!_

_Yes, you could. Now do it. Now!_

_Fine._

_Why the hell am I doing this?_

_I'm proving it to you that you're in love with him!_

_And I'm trying to prove that I don't!_

_Gah! _The 'voice' threw his hands up in the air in desperation. _Just do it! I'll deal with it if he wakes up and you didn't like it. _

Trying to calm the butterflies in my stomach and the rising blush on my cheeks, I bent down and slowly kissed Shigure lightly on the mouth. His lips were unbelivably soft, like velvet rubbed the right way.

Not wanting to wake him, I reluctantly (wait, wait, wait, wait. woah. reluctantly?) pulled away and looked down to make sure Shigure was still asleep.

His eyes were open.

_I'm in deep shit._ My face flamed. _Voice? Help?_

_I have it all under control._

_And what's your oh-so-brilliant plan?_

_I fall asleep in the back of your mind while you try to worm your way out of this._

_I hate you…_

'Oh, Hatori! Taking advantage of me while I was asleep! Surely that's beneath you!' A huge grin spread across Shigure's face and he crawled over me to settle himself in my lap. He brought his mouth close to my ear. 'But you don't know how many times I've had to restrain myself from jumping you in the night.'

My eyes couldn't get any wider._ Voice, I think you might be right._

_See? I always am._

'Th-th-then you l-like me?' I stuttered.

'Like? No. That word isn't strong enough. And neither is love. No mere words can describe what I feel for you.'

Shigure shifted until he was straddling my lap. 'But you can use love, if you'd like. Now…would you like to finish what you've started?'

I gulped, but Shigure didn't notice.

_What have I gotten myself into?_

_Well, at least you know that you're in love._

_Fine! I give up._

Shigure interupted any more thoughts by softly pressing his lips to mine, and in a way showing me that I really did love him.

I was tempted to deepen the kiss, but I wanted to tease him first. I pulled away, and watched his reaction.

Anger crossed his lust filled eyes. 'Hey! What was that for!'

'Just teasing.'

'You make me wait all these years of being desperately in love with you, and now I can't even _kiss_ you properly?' His arms flew up in the air.

'Wait…years! _How_ long did you save you've liked me?'

'Ah…ever since I met you, about fifteen years ago.'

'That long? Then I suppose youre in need of an apology for me acting like and idiot for not realizing it sooner.' Before I knew what I was doing, I had forced Shigure to the floor and was kissing him passionatly, and he was kissing me with back with just as much force. His arms looped around my neck and pulled me closer.

Shigure slowly licked my lower lip to ask entrance to my mouth, which I let him. His tongue engaged mine in a fierce battle which none of us cared who won. A groan escaped my lips as our teeth clacked together in a desperation that was unfamiliar to me even after being with Kana for so long.

_I feel like I'm betraying her._

_But is it betrayal if you love someone more than her? She found someone else, so isn't it fair that you do too? Shigure and Aaya were saying how they wanted you to find someone two thousand times better than her. I think you did a very good job, don't you?_

_Yes._


	5. Violin

pairings kyo/yuki and shigure/hatori. i love them together! both pairings:::::grins and huggs self very, very tightly:

_smartass thoughts that are always truthful, and ever deadly annoying_

_normal thoughts_

•_second person not pov person thoughts•_

'normal talking'

phone conversations and lyrics 

akito's gonna be a guy in this fic.

(author notes)

disclaimer: I DONT OWN THE BLOODY THING! (okay…been reading _way_ too many hp fics. im starting to swear a little like a brit. creepy…)

_DEATH TRAP_

_Don't fall too deep_

_Into the death trap_

_And everything to lose_

_You get attached_

_To people you don't know_

_Only to get hurt_

_For their stupid show_

_Your mind gets boggled_

_With thoughts that aren't there_

_Your heart gets crushed_

_Just so they can snicker_

_My enemies are my trap_

_Do not fall too deep_

_Into your death trap._

_No Idea Who Its By_

CHAPTER 5•VIOLIN•KYO-KUN'S POV

For some strange reason, depression filled me. It was like an oppressing blanket, filling in all the corners of my mind and weighing down my being; making me flail helplessly for anything to drag me to safety.

It might've been Yuki's fault, though I don't know what he had to do with it. I'm probably just bringing this upon myself. Wallowing in self pity that comes along with not knowing what's going on. Which is something that is happening to me at the moment. _I don't know why he doesn't seem to hate me. Maybe I'm too open, giving Yuki access to my feelings and is toying around with them. He has everything he could ever want, so why the hell would he need _me_ as a friend! He's probably just a manipulative little bastard who doesn't give a shit about what others feel, and just cares for himself._

I sighed and stood up, stretching my arms high above my head like the cat I am. _I need the release from my emotions that only music can give me. I need to play… Like I used to._

I reached under my bed and pulled out a black case and the amps beside it. I plugged them in and unzipped the case. I lifted out a midnight green, almost black, electric violin. It was exactly as I remembered it, and I hadn't seen it in ages. The last time I had played was when I was still living with Shishou. He would make me drag it out, and he'd play his drums. I still laughed every time I saw that. _He definitly doesn't look like the type of drummer person I know him as. Drummer slash fighting maniac. Sort of like me, except I play the violin. _I fond chuckle escaped my lips as old memories came flooding back.

I made all the connections for my precious instrument and lifted the bow to the strings. It started slowly, matching perfectly my fingers darting across the fingerboard. I closed my eyes and let the music flow where it willed, as my soul knew the tune better than my mind.

•Yuki-kun's POV•

I groaned when my eyes fluttered open as I awoke to the harsh music running around the house. _I never knew anyone here liked this stuff. Sure, Kyo probably likes the style, but…a violin? What the _hell

My feet hit the floor and I was about to yell at the cat for waking me up at ungodly hours when I heard the music falter and then stop. _Apparently it's a real person._ A bark of laughter. Then the music started up again and this time it was slow and sad, conflicting the emotion that was just heard from the outburst of mirth and sound before it. Feeling poured forth from it, one that could not be captured into anything except for sound, and it sluggishly drifted, as if looking for a place to rest, but finding none.

I was entranced, to say the least.

I desperatly needed to know why Kyo had such a raging battle within him that he could play such opposites with out much seeming difficulty. _That is, if it is him with the music, and if it's him playing it…_

The neko's door was open a small bit and I peeked in, watching the red-head right as he changed tempo. Anger…

Kyo's back was arched as his lithe, clawlike fingers danced across the neck of the violin and the bow moved like fire, horsehairs snapping with the force used on the strings.

_I guess it is him… Interesting._

The music rushed over me as water does to the shore. It left me breathless with the sheer intensity of it.

But I still needed to know _why_ Kyo needed to chanel his energy through his violin. The question of what had happened that was so extreme that he couldn't break a door or wall instead. _I definitly like it better. I sure as hell know that I don't want him taking out his anger on me. Sort of… depressing… He's an idiot to not notice that I absolutely hate our petty fights. Thickhead…_

I leaned my head wearily against the frame and my body shook with unshead tears. _I'm too emotional about this whole damn thing. Hell, I'm too emotional _all_ the time! Well…when I'm by myself. I can't let Kyo know how weak I really am._

The bowing sped up even more than before and screamed of pent-up anger. The music throbbed with hate, but I would still always remember it because of all the emotions whirling around.

Then Kyo did the thing I least expected of him. He let the violin drop, and was only holding onto it with the lightest of touches and the bow rested gently on the floor. And he laughed. His head was thrown back and it poured out of his mouth as a stream of sound. He paused to clutch his stomach, and then started up again. The laugher was the sound of someone who is really and truly happy for the first time in absolute ages, and then more joy comes just from hearing yourself.

I slumped down harder against the door, making a tiny thud. I froze, hoping Kyo wouldn't have heard it.

But he did.

The neko spun around with an agility only able to be used by the cat. 'What're you doing here!' he spat, all mirth gone from his face. 'What makes you think you're welcome?' Pain flashed through his eyes so quickly I wasn't sure if I had actually seen it.

'I heard your music. Why don't you ever play more?'

'I don't need to. It's sort of anger management in the extreme for me.' He tilted his head and wrinkled his nose in annoyance.

'It's beautiful, though.'

Kyo looked surprised at me complimenting him, but scoffed. 'All you're hearing is my emotions. I'm just showing the weak side of myself.'

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. 'There is nothing weak about hating someone, or feeling sad.'

'How would you know? You're always welcome. Everyone loves you. They look towards you, no matter what. They give a shit if you live or not. I'm just the stupid…worthless _cat_. No one looks towards me for things. I suppose because I was stupid enough to be tricked by you. I believed you. I once trusted you.'

'Baka Kyo. We aren't the actual spirits of the Zodiac. Why do you act as if you once liked me. That you once didn't hate me as much as you do now.'

'We aren't the actual spirits you say? Then why are we treated as them? Look at Haru! Everyone teased him because you rode on his back to the banquet! Everyone hates me for God knows what! There's too many things to count. Is it because of this? What I have to hide with my bracelet!' Kyo held up his left wrist, the one with the black and white beads circling them.

I admit it, I was speechless. Why _are_ we treated like we're the actual spirits if we really aren't them? 'I…I don't know, Kyo…'

The orange neko turned his back to me again and played again, and this time the music that came streaming from within it was filled with a sense of longing and a deep despair. Tears slowly dripped from his face and fell like rain on the violin, but he kept playing on. The song wove around the room, indecisive about where to settle, not bothered by the effect it had upon the one creating it.

_What's making him feel like that?_

I decided I had to know, so I asked without much hope of an answer: 'What's making you play like that? It almost seems like…someone died, or something.'

'Nope. Not a death. A stupid thick headed idiot who doesn't seem to be able to tell hatred from love.'

'You're in love with someone?' I felt my eyebrows rise ever so slightly.

'No. A friendship sort of love. Just…never mind. The person, as I said, is too thick headed to notice anything. Forget it.' _•I personally think it's a love love sort of thing.•_

•_If you keep talking, I'll make sure you die a long and painful death…•_

'Who is it?' But I could have been talking to a brick wall as Kyo cut himself off from the living world once more.

_Who the hell is he talking about?_

I didn't notice that I had walked back to my room until pain from my cut on my back threw me into reality again when I laid down on my bed.

My musings continued until I was jolted to concioness by Kyo stopping playing his violin and putting it away.

KYO-KUN'S POV

_Why did I tell him so much?_

_You wanted to see if he was really as 'thick headed' as you told him to be. You wanted to see if he could figure it out himself._

_For once, I might agree with you. But never again say I'm in love with him, because I'm not! I almost banged my head against the wall, and I can't very well tell Yuki that I'm schitzophrenic. (sp.? spell check isn't working now… crashes my comp…)_

The Voice chuckled softly. _True._

_Do you want a name? I don't like calling you 'The Voice' all the time._

_How about…Chapeau Noir?_

_What does it mean? And…ah…in what language…?_

_Black Hat. French._

_Okay… Whatever. Random, but…it'll do._

Chapeau Noir cheered loudly.

_Eeep! Not that loud! You're in my head!_

He sighed_. Sir, yes ma'am!_

_Do you really want me to hurt you?_

_Do you really want me to answer that?_

_I definitly know I'm going completely insane when there's a voice in my head and he names himself…Chapeau Noir…_ I shuddered and the Voice retreated back into my mind to be called upon later if I needed some_thing_ to talk to.

_Hey! I resent that!_

_Yuki…The Idiot…The Thick Headed Idiot…The One Everybody Thinks I Hate But I Really Don't…I have many names for the rat._

_The Rat That's Screwing Around With My Feelings and Making Me Think He Might Actually Care, But Doesn't._

_I wish the world wasn't so complicated._

Tears slowly dripped down my face. Hell knows I tried to stop them, but they just kept coming. I could do nothing to stop them.

My body shook in uncontrolable sobs that broke through my voice. _If I'm forced to cry, then it should at least not be so loud…_

I hadn't cried this hard for years. Not since I was a little kid. I didn't want to start again now, because I knew from experience that it became a habit.

Emotions. I hadn't really know any besides hate, self pity and annoyance almost as long as I had been tearless. Which was most of my life.

_I wish playing the violin didn't bring out the ghost of emotion that I felt inside. Well…now it isn't as much of a ghost. More of a monster than anything. Like me, I suppose._

I fell down to the floor, with my back to the wall. My legs were pulled up to my chest with my arms wrapped around them and my head flopping into them.

A sigh escaped my mouth when tears came streaming down all the harder.

_What is with stupid people and rats that can't tell hate from almost the exact opposite!_

'You're so _stupid!_' I half screeched. My head thumped against the wall. 'Ow…'

I could almost hear Chapeau Noir laughing in the background.

•YUKI-KUN'S POV•

My feet carried me outside the baka neko's door for reasons unknown to me. I just…walked there.

I gently laid my ear against the hard wood keeping me out of Kyo's room. What I heard made me step back in astonishment.

Weeping.

Kyo…was crying? Kyo was crying. Kyo was crying!

Has the world as we know it come to an end!

Sure, I've seen him crying before, but only a couple tears at a time.

The sobbing increased, and unable to stop myself, I slowly creaked open the door and looked inside. Kyo was laying against the wall and his head was thrown back, tears cascading down his face. He hardly made a sound, but you could tell from his face that he was breaking inside.

I slipped into my so-called enemies room. _I've never been good at comforting people, much less people I only know from constant fist fights. I suppose there's always been a sort of bond between us, but it's only one that can come from two people who are opposites in nearly every way. I guess…_

Kyo didn't even look up when I sat down and wrapped my arms around him. _Why the hell am I doing this? It's just going to make the rift between us broader, no matter how I wish that could be reversed. Maybe…what Hatori said could be true? He doesn't hate me? But…I can't really trust the tatsu._

_And…he did help me back after Akito…tried to kill me._ My blood started to boil when I thought of that idiot.

I slowly massaged Kyo's back and tucked his head under my chin. He clutched my shirt with trembling fingers, crying helplessly onto my shoulder.

I pulled back just long enough to look at his face. His eyes were blank and unseeing, though his features expressed all that was needed. _What the hell has made his so…unstable? And why is he breaking down all of a sudden? Why now?_

I don't think he really saw me, though he might've known someone was there. _Someone to keep him from ultimate despair, maybe?_

I rolled my eyes at my own thoughts.

My arms tightened around the red-head. For some reason I had suddenly become protective of him, even though I had no idea what the hell I wanted to save him _from_.

It took about half an hour for Kyo to calm down and his breathing return to normal. His fingers stopped clutching and his sobbing decreased. He didn't seem as tired and angry as sad and depressed.

_What the hell is with that, Kyo? I have never seen you so helpless. You have no defences. A small kitten._

Tears slowly dripped down my face in almost a sorrow for the cat's suffering. _And who the hell was he talking about when he mentioned a 'stupid thick headed person who can't tell hatred from love'? I seriously thought he meant he meant he was in love with someone. But…why the hell would he tell me? We're…just the cat and the rat. Forever opposite and forever enemies. Always bound by our curse to hate each other everlasting. Gods, whoever made up that rule was a stupid jerk!_

I cried for Kyo and _me_, selfish as that might sound. How we could've been friends without Akito or a different stupid head of family, and how they we were forced to eternally fight. Us and the ones that had come before and would come after cursed with the spirits of the cat and the rat.

I whispered 'It's alright, it's alright,' over and over in Kyo's ear while softly stroking circles on his back. It was almost as if I were his mother, the one who was never truly there for him. In mind, but not in heart.

When Kyo's breathing returned to normal and he himself was as well off as he could get, I stood up, brushing invisible dirt off my pants. I turned to go, but a quiet voice whispering caught my attention.

'Arigato, Yuki-kun. Even if you didn't mean it, arigato.'


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer:i dont own the damn thing, and remember that…FOREVA!

_WEEP YOU NO MORE, SAD FOUNTAINS_

_Weep you no more, sad fountains;_

_What need you flow so fast?_

_Look how the snowy mountains_

_Heaven's sun doth gently waste._

_But my sun's heavenly eyes_

_View not your weeping,_

_That now lies sleeping_

_Softly, now softly lies_

_Sleeping._

_Sleep is a reconciling,_

_A rest that peace begets:_

_Doth not the sun rise smiling_

_When fair at even he sets?_

_Rest you then, rest, sad eyes,_

_Melt not in weeping,_

_While she lies sleeping_

_Softly, now softly lies_

_Sleeping._

_Anonymous_

CHAPTER 6•VIOLIN PART 2•HATORI-KUN'S POV

I rolled over in bed and looked at Shigure. 'Since when does Kyo play the violin?' I asked.

He wearily blinked. 'Oh. Kazuma-dono said that he's played his whole life and it's like anger management for him when he really really needs it, or something. But…he never used it unless it was major, because it made him really emotionaly unstable. He'd get upset a lot. That's just what he said. Never heard him play before though. Why do you ask?'

'Do you sleep like a log or something! He was playing this morning for an hour or so. You didn't hear that? It was amazing!'

'_What!_ Kyo was playing the violin this morning? That was _him!_ Wow… Oh shit, though. Kazuma-dono'll probably want to know. I never knew he was so good…!' I chuckled as Shigure stared off into space, lost in his own little world.

I snapped my fingers in front of his face, and when he didn't respond I brought my lips to his, kissing him long and deeply. Shigure moaned into my mouth and wrapped his arms around my neck.

We slowly broke apart, and I looked at him. 'Aishiteru.' Shigure smiled lightly and responded with the same thing.

I pulled my lover into a hug. 'Kami-sama, aishiteru.'

YUKI-KUN'S POV

I stared blankly at the door I had just closed in front of my face.

'_Arigato, Yuki-kun. Even if you didn't mean it, arigato.' He thinks this is all for show? That I hate him? If only he knew how exactly opposite that was…_

_Wait…opposite? _Completely_ opposite?_

_No. I don't love him. _Do_ I? _Can_ I?_

_I-I-I'm not sure, though. Maybe…maybe I do…_

Kyo-kun's POV

I woke up feeling refreshed from playing the violin, after playing it for such a long time. Good enough, in fact, to go to Shishou's dojo.

I quickly changed and sprinted out the door, wondering briefly where Tohru was.

_Idiot. She said a couple days ago she would be at her friend's house. Funny. You'd think she'd want to be home since what happened to Yuki. Or…did Hatori supress her memories of that? That would be…he wouldn't have to do it, really, because Yuki has a big scar across his face. Wonder what his fan girls'll have to say to that? _That brought a small smile to my face.

I skidded to a halt in front of Master's dojo. Strangely enough, I didn't hear anyone fighting inside, but drums and a guitar. _Did he pick up his instrument again? I wonder if I could run home and grab my violin or something._ But my curiosity overcame me and I decided I had to see who it was with the guitar.

It was Haru.

_He plays? Sweet!_

But then a wave of jealousy crept up my stomach. _This was supposed to be something only between me and Master. But…I'll just ask if I can join, I guess…_

I gently eased the door open and peeked around it. Both had uncharictaristically large grins adorning their faces, but it made them look more natural, and not part of the Sohma family.

Shishou looked up from what he was playing, Haru stopping with him. 'Kyo! Hi!'

'Do you think I could quickly run home and grab my violin?'

Shishou's face cracked into a huge smile. 'I'd love that. I heard you've picked it up again. It's been a while.'

'How long have you played the violin?' I looked towards Haru. I had forgotten he was there.

My lips twitched up in a small laugh. 'Almost my whole life. Since I started living with Shishou, I think.'

'Oh. Well, you should go get it! It would be fun to have a third person in this little group thing.'

With a brief bow of my head, I took off. Almost bouncing with glee, I jumped up the stairs into my room. I took my duffel bag out from under my bed and packed everything I needed in there, exculing my violin, took both things, and bounded back downstairs.

'Going somewhere, Kyo-kun?' Shigure asked, with Hatori and Ayame looking around the doorframe with him.

'Hai. Just Shishou's, though.'

'Not to train, I take it?'

I shook my head no. 'Just let me go, okay? I just want to be over there now.'

Shigure raised his eyebrows but ducked back behind the frame.

I went as quickly as I could, not noticing someone curiously watching my every move.

Yuki-kun's POV

I secretly watched Kyo run off with his violin from behind a tree. _He looks so giddy and happy. So different from the one who I comforted late last night. He seems almost like Haru in the way that he can change moods in the blink of an eye. It's amazing._

_Where the hell is he going, anyhow? Kazuma-dono's? But…why would he bring his violin?_

After a couple of minutes, I decided to follow him. He did go to Shihan's.

To my surprise, I saw Haru there with his guitar. _He hasn't played in ages, just like, I suppose, Kyo. _The two seemed genuinely glad to see the neko there, which made me wonder if they had some secret band going on behind everyone's backs.

The red haired cat took out his violin, attaching everything to where it was supposed to be with skilled hands. A couple words were exchanged, and Kazuma-dono started off with the general rhythm that Haru joined in, adding chords here and there, and then Kyo, with the melody, which soared above everything else, making it seem like magic.

Somehow, there was some cue that all three picked up on, and as one, the music started to diminish, each adding their own solo piece as a finale. Kyo's bow started going faster and faster, his fingers nimbly dancing their way up and down the board, his face set with determination, yet his eyes overflowing with laughter.

Haru's chords blasted loud as he changed the volume and sound of the music after he stepped on one of the many buttons adorning the side of the large amps in front of him, making the strums loud and harsh, but almost soft at the same time. His foot was stomping heavily in time to the beat and his head was flying wildly, hair running everywhere.

In a couple of seconds, it was over. The three exchanged glances and burst out laughing. Kyo's violin was once again only in the tips of his fingers, his hand clutching his stomach. Kazuma-san was chuckling softly and shaking his head as he watched Kyo out of the corner of his eye. He seemed to be happy that he was laughing. Haru was on his knees, head thrown back, tears of mirth glinting in his eyes and his guitar laying forgotten to the side, its sleek red body shining slightly in the dim sunlight filtering in through the window, framed in golden rays and dust.

Once the trio had collected themselves, they each looked at each other and nodded slightly, a silent signal for Kazuma to start again.

I had never seen any of the three as happy as then, so I let a contented smile wash over my face as I watched them continue to have fun, all oblivious to my presence.

About a half hour later, Kyo stopped and gestured to Haru and said something I couldn't pick up. The white and black haired teen smirked and took the guitar from around his neck. He handed it to Kyo, while the cat gave over his violin. Haru set that aside and leaned over to Kyo, moving his hands and telling him to run his fingers down the strings. A chord was emitted from the instrument and Kyo let out a bark of sheer delight. Haru simply chuckled at his enthusiasm and continued to teach him.

I saw Kyo's lips forming the words: 'Now _I _get to teach _you!' _Haru rolled his eyes and grinned a half grin in defeat. 'Hai, hai, Sensei. Fine…'

The guitar took the place of the violin, the latter finding itself in the arms of the amused oushi. He placed the bow on the strings and drew it across, making a horrible screeching noise from being pulled too slowly with too much pressure.

Kyo laughed and covered his ears begging Haru to stop. I shook my head at their antics.

'See, look?' I vaguely heard Kyo say to his cousin. His hand covered the others, showing him the correct amount of force to use with what speed. After a couple minutes of struggling, Haru could clearly play an open note, much to the playful head-shaking of the cat and his master.

'I give up!' Haru handed the deep green violin back to its owner and lifting up his own guitar.

For the first time since I saw them practicing, I wondered why I could hear the music clearly, but not the voices.

Kazuma gave the duo a last amused glance before looking me straight in the face, as if saying that he knew I was here all along. Kyo followed his gaze and his eyes locked with mine, widening with surprise, horror, and amazingly, sadness. I slid out of sight and looked through the window where I was shaded from all light and nearly impossible to see, though I could look at and hear everything that went on inside the room.

Kyo shrugged and blinked before reassuring the worried glances with a wry chuckle. 'It's fine,' he told them. 'Just thought I saw something, that's all.'

This time it was the orange cat that coaxed the other two into playing, though at first it was hesitant and sad, slow but with an undercurrent of rage only noticeable if you were looking for it. His face contorted in pain, but he covered it up as quickly as it came and he fell into the normal routine of loudness and cheerfulness, this time slightly false.

I slipped away from where the three were playing, but not before Kazuma-san gave me a secretive smile and a wink, and then he was looking back to his drum set, all his concentration set on it.


	7. It's All Coming Together Now Sort Of

Chapter 7•It's all Coming Together Now

/\\/\\/\\/\\/\\/\\

I just like this poem. Has nothing to do with the story

THE LOCK GATE

Paul Celan

Above all this mourning Über aller dieser deiner

of yours: no Trauer: kein

second heaven. zweiter Himmel.

To a mouth An einen Mund,

for which it was one of a thousand dem es ein Tausendwort war,

I lost - verlor

I lost a word wordverlor ich ein Wort

that had remained with me: das mir verblieben war:

sister. Schwester.

To An

the worship of many gods die Vielgötterei verlor

I lost a word that was looking for me: ich ein Wort, das mich suchte:

_Kaddish_. _Kaddisch_

Through Durch

the lock gate I had to go die Schleuse mußt ich,

to save the word back das Wort in die Salzflut zurück -

to the salt waters and und hinaus -

out and across: und hinüberzuretten:

_Yiskor. Jiskor_

Yuki-kun's POV

I trudged back to the house through the woods, thinking on what I had seen. _Kyo was just so happy with those two. Happier than I've ever seen him in my whole _life!_ Could music really be that helpful to him? That he can forget everything except for the moment and having fun? He _loves_ it. It's almost like his lifeline, or something. The only thing he can hold onto in his whole existence, a life of chaos and loneliness. But Honda-san always helps him and is his friend. That's better than I could wish for. I just…push people away, yet hoping and wishing that there's someone out there who will really _care_ about me. There's just…there's just too much about me Honda-san doesn't know, and too much of my past that's too painful for me to reveal. I only feel remotely comfortable around the jyuunishi, no matter how much tension is in the room. With my _brother_, there's a certain amount of understanding that goes on. Even between Kyo and I, no matter how much he probably hates me. Its so strange, and I doubt he realizes how much we're alike. It's scary to think about sometimes. The person I was brought up supposed to hate is the one I'm closest to, the one who knows me the best, even though he hardly does at all. Though I do hope I can achieve that level of friendship with Honda-san sometime, once I'm not scared anymore. She's such a nice person._

The door slammed behind me when I walked in. I heard a humming coming from the kitchen and going to investigate, I found that Honda-san was back from her friend's house.

'Oh, welcome back, Yuki!' (I wanted her to not use an honorific for a reason. She's going to become different, and I want her like this. Let's just say she's always been like this, but never showed it in the manga…? Maybe just around her friends or something.)

I was slightly startled at the lack of a -kun or -san, but I didn't really notice. My thoughts were too much on Kyo (what type of thoughts? Wait…too early! End of chappie…hopefully!) and the jyuunishi. 'What's for lunch?'

'Oh! Soba.' (Can't for the life of me remember any other Japanese foods, and I'm way way way way too lazy to look up any of them…) She softly resumed humming as she cooked the meal.

I sat down (assuming that the table is in the kitchen. I know it isn't, but…get over yourself. And no western style table, either! Okkies?) at the table and rested my head in my arms. Gods, I was tired, and kind of sad, from watching the neko, oushi and their master playing all together like that.

A claw of jealousy wrenched my stomach as my thoughts went back to when Kyo was attempting to play the guitar, with Haru's arms around the cat from the behind, guiding his fingers to the frets on his instrument. (Look! No AN! Oh…oh shit. )

_They're supposed to be at least somewhat enemies! Not…friends…like _this I sighed, shaking my head lightly back and forth. _This sucks. I'm not supposed to be _jealous

_Jealous of Haru, or of both?_

_Huh? What do you mean?_

_Are you jealous that Haru got to be so close to Kyo, and have enough of his trust that he's allowed there, or that they're happy enough that they can forget who they truly are. That they're part of the jyuunishi, and on Kyo's part, the fact that he has limited time left out of the cage?_

_Cage?_

_He's going to be locked up by Akito when he graduates. It happens to all cursed by the cat._

_He's going to be locked up? I think maybe he mentioned it sometime. But… wouldn't someone stop it?_

_Kazuma-dono's doing all he can. There's not much you can do against Kyo's father and Akito. They both _hate_ him._

_I see what you mean._

_Back to the original topic. Who're you jealous of?_

…_All of it, I guess. That somehow Haru won Kyo's trust, and that they were happy. Why?_

_Curious_

And with that, the voice retreated into my head, and I briefely thought how weird it was to be talking to something in my mind…

'You alright Yuki?' Tohru looked questioningly down at me.

I looked up and made a face. 'Yeah. Just…tired. I don't feel all that good.'

'Ouch. Is there anything I can do?'

'Nope… I'll be fine. I just need to sleep and… Oh never mind. I'll probably feel better after lunch or something.' _And seeing Kyo. Maybe some of his happiness will rub off on me…_

'Hey, do you know where Kyo is?'

I fully intended to snap back with something like "Why the hell would I know where that baka neko is!", but instead I said: 'I think I saw him going to Kazuma-dono's.

'Thanks.' Her smile shone though even around my slightly depressed attitude. 'Haru's right,' she said after a pause. 'You two _definitely_ are starting to get along.'

I started to chuckle, and she looked on curiously. "What?", her expression seemed to say. It just made me laugh harder.

'Is it _that_ outrageous of a fact that you might not hate each other as much anymore?'

I shook my head no. 'I guess…I'll tell you,' I attempted to say. When my laughter was finally under controll, I continued. 'I never hated the baka neko. I might've tried to convince myself so once or twice in the past, but I never hated him. Annoying, yes. Confusing, yes. Hate? Never.' I wrinkled my nose. 'I was laughing because I think it was Hatori that made me become more…I don't know…open? I have no idea. Well…he just told me Kyo didn't hate me, and he was happier around me, and that somehow I made him sad or something. Well, I also realized it because of when he brought me home after…you know. You were there.'

She nodded her head, a sad expression flitting across her eyes. 'I'm sorry I didn't do anything.'

'There was nothing you could do. Akito would just force Hatori to erase your memories of all of it somehow. Of us, too. Though I'm quite suprised how Kyo…brought down that idiot. Interesting…in a fashion… Well, no you've heard my whole confession! I don't hate the idiot! Never did!'

Tohru laughed along with me. _Gods, it feels good to be laughing again. I deserve it after so long. _'How can you do this?' she asked softly.

'Do what?'

'You've just been hurt badly by Akito and it seems like it doesn't effect you whatsoever.'

'I guess…I'm just used to it. He's hurt me before. Hurt me badly. It's…a touchy subject. But…to sum it up, I had my own special room where he would torment me in. I was degraded, made to feel worthless, and…he used the…the same whip on me. Like the one he just used. It…I've seen it too many times. It's…it's been burned into my memory. _Engraved!_ I can't stand it… And now I've told you more than I probably should've.'

Honda-san smiled lightly. 'It makes me feel happy. That you trust me enough to tell me that. I don't know why, but…it make me feel special.' The smile grew just a little bit.

I shook my head. Then my eyes flew open wide. _Honda-san…she's… _different! _What the hell happened? She doesn't seem…as ditzy or clumsy or… apologetic…! Huh? _'Ah…Honda-san…? Why aren't you…well…'

'Clumsy? Idiotic?'

'Yeah…' I scratched my head.

'I was wondering when you'd notice. This is…well…kind of me. I guess it really is, I just never show it to anyone. Saki and Arisa've seen it, but that's it. Different side, you could call it. I'm not like Haru or anything. I can choose. I rather like this one more, but…something about you being hurt like you were made me…become more myself, I suppose. Oh, and…please, call me Tohru. We're friends, I don't mind being called by my first name, and without honorifics.'

I nodded my head.

Hond-_Tohru_ started as someone walked into the room. I looked up and my eyes collided with a pair of crimson ones. I looked down to the table, avoiding the gaze of my cousin.

Kyo sat down across from me, asking when lunch was.

'About five minutes!' was Tohru's cheerful reply.

I flopped back onto the floor, taking in a deep breath. 'J'ai fatigue. _Tres_ fatigue.' (AN. For those who don't know French. 'I'm tired. _Very_ tired.')

'_Good_ for you,' mumbled the cat.

I propped myself up on an elbow, scowling at him, then at Tohru. 'Do I have permission to kill him, oh Mighty Tohru, Who-Makes-Everyone-Bow-Down-To-Her?'

The girl chuckled and shook her head. 'You two…'

The neko's eyes clashed with mine, except this time, they didn't separate. My brow furrowed for no reason besides not knowing why I couldn't tear my gaze from his.

Mixed emotions flitted over Kyo's face. Untrust, confusion, surprise and a little bit of happiness. Neither of us noticed Tohru sliding out of the room, chuckling.

Tohru-kun's POV

I'm glad I told them what I'm really like. It's no fun hiding all the time, and the act gets a little boring. Sure, I'm still caring, but…I don't get worked up over the smallest stuff at _all!_

I walked into the living room to see Hatori with Shigure in his lap, arms around his waist, and Aaya watching them, smiling happily.

I stopped, raised my eyebrows, then broke out laughing. The two broke apart quickly, making me laugh even harder.

'Really, you two. I don't mind that you're together. I think it's rather _cute.' _Hatori and Shigure blushed. 'Oh, and by the way, don't go getting Yuki and Kyo drunk quite yet. I was talking to them earilier, and irght before I left, they couldn't take their eyes off each other. Don't use it unless it's an extreme…'

'H-how'd you know…about our plan?' stuttered Hatori from where he'd fallen on the ground.

'It's not that hard to figure out, you idiot. And, it's not all that hard to figure out the two of them like each other. They're just…idiots, you know? Both of them.'

The Mabudachi Trio looked at me like I was crazy. 'What?' I asked. 'If you were against their relationship, then it's be…sort of…strange to try to set them up.'

'I-It's not that. Aren't you…well…?'

'Ah yes! Yuki asked me the same thing earlier. I…well---What you guys are used to…is…well…you could call it a mask. It's been there since mom died. You can hear a lot of crap if every one thinks you're a klutz and a ditz!'

The three were speechless.

'Okaaaay. I'll be leaving now…' I scurried out of the room, the leaned heavily against the wall, laughing. 'Their faces were…priceless!' I choked out to myself.

'Honda-san? Are you alright? I heard you talking to yourself.;

I looked up to see Yuki looking at me with concern in his eyes.

'It's _Tohru._'

'Oh…gomen, Tohru.'

'Arigato. Oh yeah! I _was_ talking to myself, I guess. Just saying that Hatori, Shigure, and Aaya's faces were absolutely hilarious! I told them who I really was. And…Hatori and Shigure finally got together. They thought nobody would notice.'

Yuki's eyes widened. 'They're _together!_'

'Mmhm!' I nodded happily, grinning. 'They're perfect for each other.'

'Whatever you say.' The nezumi was looking more and more scared by the moment.


End file.
